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I conducted a masturbation experiment with the Magic Wand . . . Here’s what I found
Listen to this article:
Flicking the bean. Wanking. Self-loving. Jilling off. Ménage à moi.
All of these are different (and very creative) ways to say “masturbation.” Masturbation is defined as touching one’s own body/genitals for sexual pleasure. While masturbation is not a dirty word, it’s not uncommon to feel shame and guilt when it comes to self-pleasure. This is due to a combination of cultural norms, religious influences, lack of meaningful media representation, harmful myths we all learned in sex ed, and more.
At the same time, men get to talk about yanking their chains, so to speak, with a free pass and aren’t typically made to feel like they’re doing something unbecoming -- hell, I can think of three instances off the top of my head in very popular media where we see or hear about men masturbating with different kinds of foods (from an apple pie to a fresh peach to jell-o) let alone sharing a more typical masturbation experience.
While I’m not necessarily interested in normalizing the combination of masturbating with food (be careful, girlies, you could get a yeast infection!!!), I am interested in talking about masturbation in a positive light and being honest about the very real positive impacts it has for people, especially women and people with vulvas. That’s why I decided to take pleasure into my own hands -- figuratively and literally -- with the Magic Wand.
In a nutshell, I wanted to answer one question: What is the impact of daily Magic Wand use on my health and wellness as well as my sexual experience when compared to regular sexual activity and no sexual activity?
For consistency, I knew I needed to use a single method. More specifically, a vibrator that would do the trick every time. If you’re a regular Sex Ed with DB listener or follower you know that I’ve had a crush on the Magic Wand for a long while. It’s one of my favorite sex toys for two simple reasons: 1) it makes me orgasm without fail and 2) it makes me do it real quick. Whenever I use it, I get the pleasure I want and I always feel good afterwards -- happier, calmer, more centered.
My prior experiences with the Magic Wand led to a few more questions: Are there real positive impacts here? How can pleasure influence other areas of my life? Could I actually measure the effect of using the Magic Wand on my overall health, wellness, and sexual experience?
The Experiment
I decided the project should be a three-week experiment: the first week of the experiment was Abstinence Week (no sexual activity), the second week was Treatment Week (Magic Wand use every day, with or without my partner), and the third week was a Regular Week (regular sexual activity with and without my Magic Wand). Every day during the experiment, I recorded measures on 27 variables, including stress, anxiety, productivity, mood, horniness, orgasm experience, and more!
At the end of three weeks, my team and I analyzed the results by noting changes in each variable over time. (See the Appendix at the end of the article for all the details.)
Key Takeaways
I know, I know, you’re a busy bee so I’m going to cut to the chase here. At the end of my experiment, here’s what I found:
When using the Magic Wand every day, I experienced less stress, anxiety, and physical tension.
I reported more frequent positive moods when using the Magic Wand every day, including higher levels of confidence.
My orgasms came faster and were more enjoyable when I used the Magic Wand every day.
My level of horniness increased over time when using the Magic Wand every day.
While the results from this experiment are limited to my personal experience, what’s cool is that my results are consistent with prior research showing the benefits of masturbation! We don’t talk about it enough, but studies have shown a wide range of benefits from masturbation, including decreased stress, improved mood, higher confidence, and more overall sexual satisfaction, particularly for people with vulvas.
But these are just the top takeaways! I had six unique hypotheses before the experiment began. I know, that’s a lot but I’m sure you would have a bunch, too, if you were about to do a flicking the bean experiment for three weeks. To see the full results, scroll down to the “Hypotheses & Results” section below!
Journal
Throughout the experiment, I kept a daily written journal and recorded a daily vlog to capture anecdotes, thoughts, and feelings. Below are just a few of my journal entries and links to vlogs. Click here to access ALL of my journals and vlogs!
Day 1 of the experiment and things are not as expected! I woke up sleepy from having to pee about 3 times during the middle of the night and the morning. Exercising on my citibike to meet a friend of mine felt good (biked for a total of ~30 minutes). I almost felt like I wanted to masturbate *just* because I couldn't -- which is interesting! The things that really made me excited were watching "Pretty Woman" for the first time (holy hell that piano scene, please pinch me) and finishing my romance novel "People We Meet On Vacation" -- although the spicy scenes were few and far between.
This was a pretty busy Saturday -- I was doing work and had a family function to attend so I didn't exercise and was a little stressed. I was prepping for wedding dress shopping which made me a bit anxious and excited. My back has been bothering me and I've been feeling some neck tension, too. I felt a body urge to make out with my partner after not connecting so much for 6 days.
This was such a good day!!! And it was the first day I used porn (Dipsea, one of my favorites). I've been sleeping super well, exercising, and just generally feeling really good. I have been looking forward to masturbating more now compared to the beginning of the week where it felt more like an obligation. My body feels good, my anxiety is much lower than last week and the beginning of this week! Good feels all around!
I got a haircut today!!! I feel like whenever I get a haircut I'm automatically in a good mood. I also had really great sex with my partner this morning which set up the day for happiness and connection between us. I didn't have too much work to do today and I swam laps at the pool. Overall, I felt good, was happy, and it was a great day!
Today was kind of a weird day and I can't believe this experiment is coming to a close! Part of me really wonders if the daily masturbation / use of the magic wand impacted my overall mood positively. It kind of seems like that + exercise + good sleep TRULY is the key to happiness??? We shall see!!!
Hypotheses & Results:
Anxiety, Tension, and Stress
HYPOTHESIS: Anxiety, tension and stress will decrease during and after Treatment Week.
FINDINGS: This was TRUE!
Tension and anxiety were lowest during Treatment Week and remained low during Regular Week.
The sum of Tension logged on a scale of 1-4 each day (relaxed, neutral, moderate, tense) was down 48% during Treatment Week compared to Abstinence Week. (Did you read that!? 48%!! Holy guacamole!)
The sum of Anxiety logged on a scale of 1-4 (calm, neutral, moderate, anxious) each day decreased by 21% during the Treatment Week and stayed low during Regular Week.
Stress was 27% lower during Treatment Week (daily Magic Wand use) when compared with Abstinence Week and remained low during Regular Week.
I never thought masturbating could potentially replace deep breathing or going for a brisk walk as an antidote to anxiety but here we are!
Mood, Confidence, and Happiness
HYPOTHESIS: Daily Magic Wand use will be associated with improved mood, confidence, and happiness when compared with Abstinence Week. These levels will remain improved during Regular Week.
FINDINGS: This was TRUE!
Treatment Week was associated with a 19% increase in confidence when compared with Abstinence Week. Confidence levels remained high during Regular Week. Hubba hubba!
There were more positive moods during Treatment Week than either Abstinence Week or Regular Week.
Happiness was relatively consistent throughout the experiment, with a small 3% average increase during Treatment week. This was kind of awesome to see -- that I’m a generally happy person. I think seeing that made me even more happy, almost as if it’s a self-fulfilling prophecy of happiness.
Productivity & Focus
HYPOTHESIS: Productivity and focus will be higher during Treatment Week when compared with Abstinence Week and Regular Week.
FINDINGS: This was INCONCLUSIVE!
While productivity average was up 10% and focus average was up 2% during the Treatment Week compared to Abstinence Week, variances were small and there were no major trends of note. So, I basically learned that taking myself to pleasure town didn’t make me better at my job … which was to masturbate for a week lol. If I think about that for too long I’ll get into a strange loop.
Sleep Length and Quality
HYPOTHESIS: Sleep length and quality will improve during Treatment Week when compared to Abstinence Week.
FINDINGS: This was FALSE!
Sleep length and quality were consistent throughout the experiment (I’m a pretty skilled sleeper no matter the circumstance, what can I say? 😉).
Orgasm Experience
HYPOTHESIS: Using the Magic Wand every day will facilitate quicker orgasms during Treatment Week than orgasms achieved during Regular Week.
FINDINGS: This was TRUE (with a couple of asterisks)!
5 orgasms during Treatment Week using the Magic Wand took under 9 minutes to achieve, while both orgasms during Regular Week took over 9 minutes.
Logged average Orgasm Enjoyment on a scale of 1-10 was 33% higher with Treatment Week vs. the Regular Week. This makes sense to me as the orgasms I get from using the Magic Wand are strong as hell!
However, the data here is directional because I only had 2 orgasms in week 3 to compare to.
Horniness
HYPOTHESIS: Horniness will decrease over the course of Treatment Week.
FINDINGS: This was FALSE!
Horniness increased throughout the Treatment Week. This was the most surprising result as I thought I’d be #over forcing myself to experience pleasure as the Treatment Week went on but it turned out I became more of a raging horndog??? Fascinating.
Conclusion:
If you made it to the end of this article, you know more about my sexual health and wellness than most doctors I’ve ever been to lol. Pretty neat-o!
In summary, my experiment showed that daily masturbation with the Magic Wand was associated with positive influences on my personal health and wellness. The proof is in the pudding: I was a happier, less tension-filled, less stressed version of myself during daily Magic Wand use, and this had residual effects the following week.
By doing this incredible experiment and analyzing the results, I found that my sexual pleasure is one very important piece that makes up my overall happiness and wellness. I truly feel like I’ve cracked my own happiness code: great sleep, regular exercise, low stress, and sexual pleasure (the exact cadence of which moving forward remains to be seen!) set me up to be the absolute best version of myself. This makes me better for my partner, my friends and family, strangers I meet wherever I go, and most importantly, for me.
I want us as a collective to prioritize our pleasure just like we prioritize other areas of wellness in our lives such as healthy eating, bullet journaling, going to therapy, or doing meditation. If you’re interested in running your own pleasure experiment, sign up at this link and we will share the Magic Wand Experiment Template with you. How you do the experiment is up to you, but may I recommend using the Magic Wand!? 😋
At the end of the day, I want this experiment to encourage us to wonder: how much happier would the world be if we all just took time to butter our muffins more consistently and more intentionally? Go find out for yourself!
Limitations:
All experiments have limitations and mine was no exception. First, an important disclaimer, which is that the Sex Ed with DB Podcast is proud to have Magic Wand as a sponsor. In addition, this experiment consists of one person’s experiences; I am showing my personal insights regarding daily pleasure and associations I experienced in measured health and wellness variables. Based on this limited sample size (just me!), I’m not able to claim statistical significance or causation for my results. The way we designed this study was that Regular Week took place after Treatment Week, as we wanted to note any trends that continued once I resumed normal sexual activity, but this could mean the Regular Week results were impacted by the Treatment Week. More research is needed to understand pleasure, masturbation, and their impacts on overall health and wellbeing for people with vulvas. Future studies might include the use of more elaborate control settings, counterbalancing, longer study durations, wash out periods, use of standard mood inventories, use of technology to collect biometric data, and a larger subject population.
Further, there are a few important notes on the way we ran the experiment and events that occurred during the experiment. One big one is the way the experiment mapped on to my menstrual cycle. I got my period on the first day of the Regular Week, which could have impacted some of the variables. I am not on hormonal birth control and am more prone to fluctuations in mood the week prior to my period and during the week of my period. We can estimate that I was ovulating ~14 days prior to my period, which fell on Day 1 of Abstinence Week. Ovulation and chemical changes during those first few days could have impacted my horniness levels, sleep quality, and mood variables. Porn was only used twice during Treatment Week so it is difficult to draw conclusions regarding porn use and its impact on pleasure. Only 2 orgasms occurred during Regular Week, limiting strength of results regarding orgasm quality and experience.
Appendix
For variables logged on a 1-10 scale (i.e. stress, focus, horniness, and confidence), this meant comparing trends, averages, and totals by week. For more qualitative findings (like mood and anxiety level), we assigned numeric values to the findings making them easier to analyze over time.
