Season 8, episode 5: Everyone Can Bottom with The Bottom's Digest Founder
ALEX HALL
Danielle Bezalel (she/her):
Alex, welcome to the podcast. What's up?
Alex Hall (He/Him):
I'm so happy to be here. I love you so much. So I'm so stoked.
Danielle Bezalel:
The feeling is very mutual. We are pretty new, but close tight friends, I would say already.
Alex Hall:
Yes, yes.
Danielle Bezalel:
There are people that you meet from the internet. And sometimes you're just kind of like, I want to be friends with this person. They seem very fun and cool and hip and nice. And I want to know you.
Alex Hall:
Oh my God. Thank you so much. That means the world to me. I'm like, I feel the same about you. It's just that smile. You know, you got that smile. That's just like, it's so welcoming. And it's like, I still can't believe you lived in New York because people in New York just don't smile as much as
Danielle Bezalel:
because there are many rats that we're very sad about there and the weather's sometimes shitty.
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
But yeah, New Yorker, that's interesting. Yeah, I find that my time in New York, and I'm a New Yorker, like I was born and raised on Long Island though, not the city, not a city kid, like a cool kid.
Alex Hall:
Gotta throw that in there.
Danielle Bezalel:
You have to, you can't say that you have city cred when you don't,
Alex Hall:
Yeah, people will pull that out.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes, but yeah, I think that I'm a pretty friendly, sarcastic New Yorker, I would say that's how and you're kind of a friendly, sarcastic southerner.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, I'm from Houston and Houston has its own reps and I would say that I am totally the bless your heart kind of gal. So, you know, like shady sound bites that no one really everyone's like, oh my god, he's so sweet. I'm like, you didn't even listen to what I just said. So, so thank you for that. We'll take nice today. We'll take that.
Danielle Bezalel:
We'll take nice, we'll take sweet. Why don't you go ahead and introduce yourself to the masses, tell people who you are and what the hell it is that you do here.
Alex Hall:
Ah, work, absolutely. So my name is Alex Hall. I'm the host of The Bottoms Digest. The Bottoms Digest is my food channel where I teach you all things anal really, especially about how to eat before engaging in anal sex. But it really has stemmed from my background of lots of careers that I've had. I've been working in reproductive rights as a graphic and web designer, as well as a video editor for the last five years. I'm actually still in the reproductive rights movement. currently. And before that, I was a bartender at queer clubs and bars.
Danielle Bezalel:
Okay, that's cool.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, so in a way, I was kind of hosting the club all night.
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
And I think that's where I really learned how to speak a lot of queer lingo as well. And I really learned how to vibe and work with drag queens a lot and serving
Danielle Bezalel:
good skill.
Alex Hall:
customers right at the best skill, honestly.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
That's like talk about survival skills. But I've always loved to cook more than anything. I've cooked every single day for probably like two decades now I'm 30 years
Danielle Bezalel:
Really?
Alex Hall:
old. Yeah, I just love it. My whole family loves to cook. I was always taught this. I've eaten out so few times in my life for real. So that's kind of where the bomb side just is like this intersection of my past as a bartender, my love for cooking, love for body autonomy and reproductive rights and fighting for it. And the bombs I just is really just like, I don't wanna be too political, but it is a political movement in itself because it is meeting the moment with sex ed and combating a lot of crap out there. Quite
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes.
Alex Hall:
literally combating crap now that I think about it.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes, we're talking about bottoming. So we're combating crap in, you know, metaphorically, physically, literally.
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
Wow. Okay, I really like that background that you're sharing that you are you've been cooking for two decades daily, because I think that that in and of itself makes a lot of sense. It comes through when I see your passion for your recipes.
Alex Hall:
I'm so glad.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah. And I think that Pairing that with reproductive rights is the most authentic way that you can create content that you want to create.
Alex Hall:
Absolutely, because I feel that if sex ed was even half where it was where it needs to be in the school system that queer sex ed would not be where it needs to be still and because of the nature of bottoming there was a major culinary aspect and a gut
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes.
Alex Hall:
health aspect that goes into bottoming and Like for real, I just really don't think that even if sex ed was where it needs to be it would not include that Like it just was a light bulb moment for people when they landed on my page. Like, oh yeah, food really matters for this.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah, totally. And I think even as you know, a sexually fluid educator myself, but mostly, you know, not been discussing anal sex or not having anal sex personally, I'm sure that that really biases my own sex education. And so I'm really glad to be able to talk to you about this today because
Alex Hall:
Oh yes.
Danielle Bezalel:
it's not only your lived experience, but because you have this experience with other queer people and namely, I don't know if a majority of your audience are cis men or people with penises, I'm sure we can get into that, but I think that
Alex Hall:
Totally.
Danielle Bezalel:
it's really important to have a speaker on behalf of butt holes everywhere
Alex Hall:
Yes!
Danielle Bezalel:
who have anal sex, who, everything there is to know about bottoming, which is why this is a whole kind of anal sex bottoming related episode today.
Alex Hall:
work. That's what I'm here for, girl.
Danielle Bezalel:
You're in. You're and for that reason, you're in.
Alex Hall:
Yes.
Danielle Bezalel:
So let's start from the beginning, you know, from the beginning: what is bottoming. Right. Like we want to know from you, what does that word mean? Tell us the queer lingo that you're referring to. Let's make it accessible to all.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, totally. So, bottoming, funny enough, bottoming can be a verb or a noun. There are people that totally identify as a bottom. I try to use it as both. I'm trying to move funny enough away from using it as a noun so much because that puts people in boxes. But in the verb sense, in the most literal verb sense, it just refers to being on the receiving end of anal sex, aka the person being penetrated. So, This really doesn't have anything to do with masculinity, femininity, who's who in the relationship, nothing like that. It's just simply a matter of sexual desire and preference. So
Danielle Bezalel:
Right. It's
Alex Hall:
that's...
Danielle Bezalel:
like, do you got a butthole? You can bottom.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, yeah, seriously. There's a lot of them. FYI,
Danielle Bezalel:
Lot of buttholes.
Alex Hall:
there's a lot of the holes in this planet. So that's just the most literal sense of bottoming. But in the noun sense, like there are people that definitely like, I am a bottom. This is my 100% sexual preference. This is all I want. But there's lots of people that just want to bottom, that don't identify as being a bottom.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah, totally. And when you first started the Bottoms Digest, you as a queer person, were you kind of coming from this idea of there's not really content like this out there and therefore I need to make it or what was kind of like the beginnings of the Bottoms Digest?
Alex Hall:
so a couple things really. Like I said, I've been cooking for two decades. So I lost my virginity. I was very blessed to grow up as an openly gay person and I lost my virginity when I was 16 to a man. So I guess to a teenager. But I lost my virginity when I was 16. And I think that I was lucky back then because I probably cooked for myself that day. I probably didn't go to Taco Bell or something. I probably just made myself lunch or dinner or I don't really remember what time of the day I lost my virginity. But I think that plays a major aspect. But I think my biggest inspirations for starting the channel was number one, I am my customer. I personally prefer to bottom in the bedroom. I am a verse bottom, but bottoming is what I go for the most. It's just what I like. And I love to cook, I like to eat, and I like to get fucked. So guess what? I'm not really willing to give up any of those and I never have and I never will. And like, I didn't even find out about douching until I was 22. I'd been having anal sex for six full years at that point,
Danielle Bezalel:
Wow.
Alex Hall:
having never really douched. So the second biggest inspiration was when I actually, funny enough, lived in New York City. When I lived in New York, My husband and I had to reevaluate our budget for obvious reasons.
Danielle Bezalel:
Of course.
Alex Hall:
And meat in the city, we lived in Manhattan and meat in the city was so expensive. I could not believe it. So we didn't cut it out of our diets completely, but we did cut meat out of our diet about half of the week and we went more plant-based. And I was immediately seeing the results in both the bathroom and the bedroom.
Danielle Bezalel:
Okay.
Alex Hall:
more plant-based diet. So I was more regular. I was getting way more natural fiber. I wasn't having to take fiber supplements as often. Fiber supplements still fill in the gap, which is great, but it's better to get it from natural fiber when possible. But that was making prep a snatch. And with just a little bit of ingenuity, oh God, I can never say that word. I'm from the south, y'all. Don't give me, you have to remind. I also like, I usually wear Invisalign, so my tongue slips up. But with a little bit of ingenuity,
Danielle Bezalel:
You got it.
Alex Hall:
I didn't feel like I was really sacrificing. I was trying to make these dishes taste as close as possible to the original. So when I was making like my vegan cheese sauce, I wanted something that replicated like trailer park Velveeta cheese, like that
Danielle Bezalel:
Sure.
Alex Hall:
I grew up on. So. That was kind of the goal there was to make these things taste as close as possible to the original and not like vegan options. So
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
that was kind of when I was like, wow, this could really help a lot more people. It's never really about giving up stuff. It's not really about like, oh, go vegan. Go. It's really just about getting more plant diversity into your lifestyle and getting more plant diversity into your day to day so that you have an overall happier gut and overall happier. time bottoming and preparing to bottom and stuff like that.
Danielle Bezalel:
Absolutely. And I think like a couple things that I want to say off the back of that. One, I really like that you use humor to really disarm people. Like you start your videos with like, hey, you starving sluts. Are you trying to eat the best mac and cheese your goddamn life? Like who doesn't want to see that video? It's very funny. Your video editing skills and the way you shoot it.
Alex Hall:
Thank you.
Danielle Bezalel:
It's phenomenal. So just like hats off to you for that. But I really like this idea of hey, like we don't want you to be giving anything up. whole idea of, oh, you need to not eat at all, or just, oh,
Alex Hall:
Totally
Danielle Bezalel:
like I'm just eating ice
Alex Hall:
tired.
Danielle Bezalel:
And I think that that whole idea does feed into, no pun intended, the horribleness of diet culture in general, right?
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
There's this idea of like, you have to starve yourself, don't eat anything if you're gonna get intimate with somebody else, and it's just not healthy to think of it like that, and it doesn't taste good to do that, so. I love that about your stuff.
Alex Hall:
Thank you so much. That again comes back from my intersection of my back, my previous careers in politics and reproductive rights and in bartending. When I was a bartender, my tips would double the sassier I was all night. I'd be like, here's your goddamn drink asshole. And they would tip me $20.
Danielle Bezalel:
That's funny.
Alex Hall:
I was like, here's your drink, it'd be five bucks or something.
Danielle Bezalel:
Sure.
Alex Hall:
So especially with the drag queens, the shadier I was with the drag queens, the more they would... love me, funny enough. So when I was doing this content for the Bombs Digest, that was super important for me to make it humorous because what I've noticed in reproductive rights was that yes, we're all pissed. We are all mad about the state of things, but how are you making people digest these things, pun intended, in a more light manner? Like
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
how, like some of our favorite teachers that we all remember were some of the funniest teachers
Danielle Bezalel:
True.
Alex Hall:
and Elementary, middle school, high school, college, they made it. They broke down that wall immediately and invited you into a world to come learn with them. So that's why it's really funny. It's really important to me to make it funny at all costs.
Danielle Bezalel:
Absolutely, yeah, and you're right. I think I try to do the same thing with sex-evident DB of
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
being silly. Everyone can relate when they're laughing about something, and especially when we're talking about anal sex, which can be a topic that people
Alex Hall:
Mm-hmm.
Danielle Bezalel:
might be really shy about. I know especially straight people, straight women, maybe that's not their domain as much. So it's really important to kind of break down these barriers, like
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
you said, and make it accessible to as many people as possible.
Alex Hall:
Yeah. I mean, at the end of the day, sex is kind of silly. Like it's kind of a, like it can be intimate and whatnot. Sure. But it's also really silly and dumb sometimes too. Like you're, you're taking this dumb organ and putting it in another organ.
Danielle Bezalel:
Just slapping
Alex Hall:
Slapping it. And like, I always tell people, like some of my friends ask me about questions about bottoming and stuff, just as friends outside of the channel and stuff, I'm always like, I can't believe we're not laughing more in the bedroom half the time, because it's just like, switching positions half the time can be the most awkward, funny thing. So
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
it's, you know, just making it funny, makes it relatable too. It
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
just brings it full circle. So.
Danielle Bezalel:
It really does. You're right. I wonder if you can talk to me a little bit about some myths maybe like a top top one or top three that you can maybe dispel for folks when it comes to specifically talking about bottoming and food.
Alex Hall:
Absolutely. Okay. Yes. So myth number one is you had just made this comment actually was you got a star before bottoming. My channel proves that that is not the case. In fact, Alex Hall, when he was 16 to 22 proves that that was the case. I had never starved. I didn't even know that was a joke until my early twenties. I'm 30 years old right now. And that is just not the case. Dr. Carlton, who's a gay GI doctor, based out of California. I love him. We're good friends at this point. We've actually done quite a few articles together at this point with the press. He talks all the time about the gastrocolic reflex, which is a signal your brain sends to your rectum to empty out when you eat food. And he mentions that you shouldn't eat 30 minutes to an hour before bottoming, especially if you have IBS, because the gastrocolic reflex is a lot stronger in people that have IBS, which makes a lot of sense when you. say these things out loud, but that's definitely not a full ass day. So that's myth number one is like you do not need to starve all day. That is just simply not how digestion works.
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
What you're eating right now can take a full day to reach the end of its course
Danielle Bezalel:
Wow.
Alex Hall:
into the toilet. So there is no reason to starve all day. That's why my channel focuses fully on foods that make you feel uncomfortable because gas and bloating can hit you really quick.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes.
Alex Hall:
If your body does not agree with something, you will know pretty quickly. So that's myth number one. I think myth number two is that certain foods are off limits. And I'm actually reading a book by Tim Spector right now called Food for Life. I love him. He's an epidemiologist, which for people that don't know what that is, epidemiologists investigate patterns and causes of disease and injury in large populations. And Tim Spector. He specifically specializes in diet for large populations
Danielle Bezalel:
Mmm.
Alex Hall:
and he's in the United Kingdom, he's British. But what I always like to say is there's eight billion of us on this planet. That means there's eight billion goddamn different guts and butts on this planet.
Danielle Bezalel:
True.
Alex Hall:
And Tim Spector, he really talks about the complexity of food and how each one of our guts is truly unique to us. So I've kind of pivoted with the bottom side just in the last year where like, I remind people that These are recipes. Everyone knows that recipes are guidelines. You can change a recipe to however you want. There's a reason recipes say salt to taste.
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm.
Alex Hall:
Some of us like salty food, some of us don't like salty food. And with that being said, some of us react differently to foods. In fact, all of us react very differently to every single food. So take my stroganoff, for example, my stroganoff recipe on the bottom side, Jess. If you are sensitive to mushrooms, leave them out.
Danielle Bezalel:
Hmm.
Alex Hall:
Sometimes it's that simple to just hone in on an ingredient that you see in a recipe and be like, oh yeah, my body does not like that thing. The amount of times I'll get a comment and be like, oh, I saw this recipe you made and there's onions in it. I can't do onions. And I'm like, okay, girl, don't do onions then.
Danielle Bezalel:
Just don't.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, right. Leave it out then. And people are like, well, oh my God, but I'll miss the flavor. I'm like, okay, well, you can only lead a horse to water, babe. So, but Tim Spector, he's great. He just, he reminds you that there's a lot of nuance in ingredients and foods. And with what you just said about diet culture, we don't know anything about diet and food. And that's what I really like about Tim Spector is he is a scientist reminding us that we just recently found out about all the chemicals that are in food. like the good, but natural chemicals.
Danielle Bezalel:
Hmm
Alex Hall:
So we're still learning about these things. So it's a big reminder, a big thing, a big important thing to remember
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
that recipes are guidelines and you need to adapt them to what works for your body. So that was a long myth number two, but
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah, it's good.
Alex Hall:
my favorite about, I think this last one, myth number three is It's specifically about bottoming rather than food and that it's about, I actually just posted a video today on my social media is about this. It's that when an accident happens in the bedroom, you're supposed to be embarrassed about it. You're like, it's supposed to be this like big thing that everything needs to stop. And like, you're supposed to feel all this shame and all that, but that is absolutely wrong. Accidents will happen. You are literally fucking an ass. Like I, I cannot
Danielle Bezalel:
Grow up!
Alex Hall:
I cannot say it any differently than that. You are fucking a butt. So what my godmother always tells me, she is an East Texas lesbian. She loves my channel. She is so proud of it. She always tells me when I tell her this specifically about the messes in the bedroom and whatnot, she always says, don't get in the pool if you're afraid to get wet.
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally,
Alex Hall:
And, and I say it all the time on my channel now, are like, Our society and media especially never highlights this reality. Like, Brokeback Mountain, that movie, surely, surely they had a poopy accident.
Danielle Bezalel:
For sure.
Alex Hall:
Surely they had an accident. Two cowboys in the mountains for days and days with no access to plumbing. Let's be fucking real.
Danielle Bezalel:
Wow, you're really putting this all in a new perspective
Alex Hall:
Like be fucking real. Like, he spit in his hand, fucked Jake Gyllenhaal, and then cut. Like that we never ever ever see the next part. So that really, like, I don't even say accidents can happen. They will happen. Every single person will have 1000. I was like one accident. That's not enough. One, you'll have plenty. And the only real answer of fixing this is learning how to be more supportive and communicative in those moments.
Danielle Bezalel:
Hmm.
Alex Hall:
So those are some of the big myths.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah, I did see your video on this and I really thought it was really funny. You think that that's like the worst thing that can happen to you?
Alex Hall:
Yeah. for anyone that's listening, there was just this guy that posted on TikTok that was like the most embarrassing thing that will ever happen to a bottom and it was an accident in the bedroom and I was like, bitch, there are way more embarrassing. Have you even tried to apply for a home loan in 2023? Like there's way more embarrassing things like get get grow up
Danielle Bezalel:
Grow up! Yeah, there's gonna be some poop, like, and that's okay. Like, that's, if you have access to a shower, just go ahead and shower it off, and maybe, yeah, talk about it, just kind of, just know that it might happen, yeah.
Alex Hall:
Talk about it. Talking about it is so important. Like when the, whoever's topping, and again, I'm not trying to use that language of the top. Whoever's
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
topping, when they pull out and they see a little poo poo or a little mess or whatever, they can talk to whoever's bottom and be like, hey, are you feeling okay? Are you feeling comfortable? Is everything like, cause that can also be very painful for whoever's bottoming.
Danielle Bezalel:
Mmm.
Alex Hall:
So it's important to communicate in those moments, be like, how are you feeling right now? And if they're saying like, oh, now that you mentioned it, it kind of hurts. That's a big like major flag right there that you took that time to stop and talk to each other, but pulling out and seeing a little poop on a condom or your dick if you're going bareback or anything, and then freaking out about it
Danielle Bezalel:
Not helpful.
Alex Hall:
In fact, you should kick that person out of your goddamn house.
Danielle Bezalel:
Oh, get the fuck out of here. If you don't like my poop, then get now.
Alex Hall:
Right.
Danielle Bezalel:
mean, yeah, it's just it is a good reminder though that like, hey, if you're gonna experiment with this, I mean, if it's the same to me, it's really the same thing as thinking about like, if you're gonna have sex on your period, like, okay,
Alex Hall:
Yeah.
Danielle Bezalel:
like there's gonna be blood, there's gonna be discharge, there's gonna be parts
Alex Hall:
Mm-hmm.
Danielle Bezalel:
of the uterus that are going to be there. You just need to be okay with it. Maybe put down a towel, maybe talk about what that might feel like or whatever.
Alex Hall:
Put down a red towel if you're a really good planner.
Danielle Bezalel:
put down a red, that's genius. If you have enough shades of red towels, depending on where you are in your cycle,
Alex Hall:
Right.
Danielle Bezalel:
can look very different reds. But yeah,
Alex Hall:
work.
Danielle Bezalel:
good point of if it hurts, then maybe stop, maybe check in. But. know that these liquids and solids potentially are normal and that you should get used to it.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, like when you take a jar of water and you try to jam something in it and all the water over fills, that's happening to your body.
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
that's why it hurts. You're having an overflow, it's pressurized, it hurts. So it's good to check in.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah, and good reminder like use a lot of lube like make sure
Alex Hall:
tons.
Danielle Bezalel:
you're yeah tons and more than you think you need.
Alex Hall:
For real, I'm like, you could never have enough. When people
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
ask me like, well,
Danielle Bezalel:
Endless.
Alex Hall:
how much is too much? I'm like, endless, there is
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
no too much, especially with
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
anal sex where you do not get wet.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
There is no such thing as too much.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
In fact, the funny sounds you hear from too much lube, that's a good sign. That
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
means you've used plenty
Danielle Bezalel:
The squeaking.
Alex Hall:
the like mini fart sounds, those are perfect.
Danielle Bezalel:
hmm.
Alex Hall:
That means you aare using enough.
Danielle Bezalel:
Right, exactly. Transitioning from poop to food, as you do every day, I'd love for you to talk to me about some of your favorite recipes. I also want to talk about maybe the process because I know that we've talked separately about this and your process for testing these recipes is really really amazing so I'd love for you to shout that out.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, for sure. So, oh, when people ask me what's my favorite recipe, it's so hard. I have like over 60 recipes currently now, which is crazy to me. We've been doing the bomb side just for two years now. My husband and I were business partners with the venture. So, I think it would have to be my very first recipe, which was my Alfredo. I actually chose that recipe intentionally and now I have like a. I have like a media breadcrumb trail of this recipe being on. So everyone could be like, okay, Alex has chosen this recipe every time, but it really is my favorite. So it's my Alfredo recipe. The Italians roll in their graves every time I bring this up because Alfredo is not a real Italian recipe, but I never said it was. I grew up in Houston, Texas. So Alfredo is actually the first recipe I learned how to cook for my mom, the real Alfredo, the very dairy heavy recipe. And for a very long time, I could not make it right. It curdled all the time. I like it just took me a very long time to learn how to make it right as a child. Because I said I've been cooking for a long time. And when I finally got it right, I just remember that moment as a kid so well that I remember finally nailing the timing of it all and getting it well done. And when I started the bombs, I just. or like a few months beforehand anyways, when I was playing with recipes and all that, I made a completely dairy-free alfredo that I had been making for a full year at that point.
Yeah, like it was just, I'm lactose intolerant. I already eat half of the recipes you see on my channel on a normal day.
Danielle Bezalel:
Hmm.
Alex Hall:
And the alfredo I had been eating for a full year before the bomb side just came out, and I made it for my mom and she was just eating it and she was like... I didn't tell her anything was different. And she was like, oh my God, this is the best you've made it. And I was like, girl, it's cauliflower. I was like,
Danielle Bezalel:
Oh, you tricked, bitch!
Alex Hall:
yeah. And so when I, which she was like, you're an asshole. And I was like, no, I'm not. Your asshole is gonna love me for the rest of the week because this is completely free and amazing. So when I posted that. it blew up immediately. I was really gagged because I was excited to start the bomb side, Jess, but I didn't realize how big it was going to pop off right off the bat.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
But I also love that recipe because it opened my eyes to people with IBS. I had not really ever taken into account that community when doing this work. And a lot of people were telling me that they couldn't eat cauliflower because their IBS. So that. created a whole new avenue for the bottom side just where like not every recipe can be obvious friendly, but it made me more aware of that. Wow, our recipes can quite literally be bottom friendly. Now you can make, we can make recipes for people that aren't even engaging in anal sex. They just want to not have to run to the bathroom after 20 minutes of
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
eating something or want dairy free recipes or low FOD map recipes, which low FOD map. I won't go into that acronym. It's huge. But those are the foods that people with IBS eat. It's a type of sugar in foods that are hard to digest for people with IBS. So cruciferous vegetables like cauliflower have those sugars. So that's why I really liked that recipe because it was an eye-opener for a whole new lane of dishes and recipes we could create for our community. But also it has a lot of heartstrings for me as one of the recipes I grew up cooking. But... As far as testing goes, all of our recipes first get tested on me because I have a very sensitive stomach. I'm lactose intolerant as fuck. I have to, if it goes, if it will pass through me, like pass through me in a test wise, not pass through my body, then we're good. I will push it along to my test group. So for context, the first year the bottoms digest was in Texas. When I was in Texas, I had a strong community of queer people. It was a mix of women, trans people, and just general queer gay men, stuff like that, that were in my test group. And so I would test a recipe on me, and then I would push it off to them to test for phase two. And if it passed nine out of 10 of them, there were 10 people in the test group, I would...
Danielle Bezalel:
9 out of 10, that's high.
Alex Hall:
Yeah, it is high. I wanted it to be high on purpose because... This information is not accessible to people currently. And I'm not rich, so I wish I could be 100 people, but that's just unfortunately not happening. I wanted trans people to be in my test group for obvious reasons, because I want to make content for trans people as well. But trans people are usually on hormones and, and they're on medications and whatnot. So I wanted to see that, make sure that these recipes were still working with their medications. But also I had women in my test group because I had lesbian women that love to peg each other and stuff like that. So I wanted a diverse test group because that's, really what my channel was made for was for all people that want to bottom. So if it passed nine out of 10 of them, then I would publish it on my channel. We moved the bottom side just to Chicago last April. We're hitting a year here now and the test group has been a little lighter here because we're playing with new ways to test our recipes. And I'm potentially gonna start sending my written recipes to people all over and have them not only test the recipe itself, but testing the complexity of it. So was it too hard to make? Because if that was a problem, then we can nix it right away. So that's kind of where we're moving in testing right now. I have a very small test group. I'm potentially about to grow it again because I have a lot of great followers here in Chicago, and I would love to just start working with them as being a part of our test group. But I would also love to potentially start testing, just sending the recipe to people in other states and other countries and all that, and ask them to make it and test it on themselves.
Danielle Bezalel:
Ooh, other countries is interesting too, because if they don't have access to the same exact type of ingredients,
Danielle Bezalel:
like, what can they replace it with?
Alex Hall:
100%. Like, for instance, my Italian followers, I have quite a few Italian followers, funny enough, and a lot of them don't have any problems with dairy. Italian dairy is way higher quality. They grew up eating it very consistently, a very high quality product, and they have a much harder time finding the non-dairy products that I push.
Danielle Bezalel:
Interesting.
Alex Hall:
So, you know, if they test my recipes with their whole milk, heavy, high quality Italian dairy products, and they still have no problems and all that. That's a whole new lesson learned there. And we can start to apply that information into our written recipes on our website. But for now, I want to make sure we have the funding before we do stuff like that, because I want to pay them for their effort, because I don't want to be like, hey, test this for me for free so I can go benefit from it. So that's kind of like the next phase. But right now we're rebuilding a solid test group here in Chicago, taking a lot of the lessons we've learned from our first dozen recipes and applying them. And while we're still building that test group, we repost older recipes and whatnot. So yeah, that's kind of our process. We try to make it as ethical as possible because this isn't easy to find.
Danielle Bezalel:
It's really awesome. Yeah, I think like you do really do it. Again, I said this before, but I like to cook, but cooking makes me a little nervous. I don't know why. Like, okay, for example, I live in a co-op with my fiance. So we have our own like one bedroom apartment, but we're like on a property and we share a big kitchen. We have our own kitchen, but we also have a really big kitchen that we like go to dinner at. And so today, like for example, I'm making veggie pizzas, like me and one other person who's sous-cheffing for me. I'm like going to the grocery store, buying it up, you know, thinking about it like, oh, I'm. cooking for a party, right? It's like I'm
making four pizzas or something. And I know that when I'm doing it, it'll be fine, but I think I have this cooking anxiety where I just get nervous that it's gonna fucking turn out terrible. Do you have any advice for people like who want to bottom, you know, or not, who want to just like cook better meals for themselves to not have that anxiety? I'm sure other people feel it too.
Alex Hall:
Totally, so breathe more first.
Danielle Bezalel:
Good. Good, good start.
Alex Hall:
Breathe more and start light with technique. That's so important. So I've been cooking forever. I actually almost went to culinary school a long time ago and I remember that all the time that not everyone likes to cook like that. So
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
I try to remember that when I make my recipes is like, don't get crazy. I'm sure you saw this on my page the other day. I called out a lot of the... cooking bros that are just like doing the most.
I saw this guy like making scrambled eggs. He like parboiled the eggs, blended the eggs with cream, put that in a whipper, like a whip canister, whipped it out. Like I was just like, dude, fuck you. Like the French are rolling in their graves now too. Like, no, no, no, no, no. So start like, like for me, making a chicken salad, like a grilled chicken breast on salad.
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
You learn so many things with that alone. How to cook your chicken breast right. Did you season it ahead of time? How to make a simple salad dressing? How to cut the things that you're putting in your salad,
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
like cucumber and tomatoes and bell pepper, like dicing techniques. And
Danielle Bezalel:
right.
Alex Hall:
then you start to realize like, oh wow, all that anxiety was because of the lack of technique knowledge. Like...
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
like for the pizzas, how am I rolling out this dough? Holy shit. And it's like, no girl, go buy a store bought. Like,
Danielle Bezalel:
That's what I'm gonna do, for sure.
Alex Hall:
So like, when you start to like realize what the pieces are that are giving you anxiety, you can find shortcuts instead. Like, I think that's why people love Ina Garden, but Ina Garden doesn't make things very accessible. She's always like, use good olive oil. And it's like, girl, what is good olive oil then? Can you define that?
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
Can you give us a definition? So yeah, the anxiety is just like, take a deep breath, start with chill recipes. I think a lot of people are like, ooh, I'm gonna make a souffle. And I'm like, okay, you literally pick the most complex thing right off the bat.
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
I don't know what to tell you. Like a galette is an easy dessert. You buy store-bought puff pastry dough, you roll it out, you crimp the edges up and you dump fruit in it and you bake it. Start simple and if there are a million steps that means it's hard.
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
Like that means it's hard. Like if there's a million ingredients broken down into multiple sections that means it's hard. So those are some of the most accessible tips. It's just I know it sounds very like okay I could have thought about myself but...
Danielle Bezalel:
No, that is helpful from from someone who cooks a lot and I think to shift back to this whole idea of eating foods that are not only good for your body but good for your bottoming if they're wanting to do that. What are some foods that maybe someone should avoid completely the you know a couple hours before their bottoming.
Alex Hall:
Totally. So I love this question. And I've been really rethinking this question when I get it lately, because again, Tim Spector, who I mentioned earlier, Food for Life is his book that I'm reading right now, that is just phenomenal. And it's really changing the way I answer this question, funny enough. So with bottoming, I still have some solid answers, but I always preface this. We all have different bodies.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes, yes.
Alex Hall:
Always listen to your body. I... really think it's very vital to eat healthy things on days that you know you're not having sex. I know that that's not always predictable, of course, but at least you tried and you gave it a shot because then you know how your body reacts to those things because a lot of the things I'm about to say that you should try to avoid before bottoming, again, if your body doesn't agree with these, is they're very good for you and you shouldn't give them up for good, some of them. So first on that list is cruciferous vegetables, like cauliflower, broccoli, Brussels sprouts. There are exceptions that I have found, like kale doesn't give me any problems, but broccoli, dead. I'm dead all day. I'm out of commission all day. It's not happening. But I have found that if I buy organic broccoli, not as many problems. So that's why it’s really nuanced. You need to know these things about yourself. But cruciferous vegetables are one of the healthiest things on the planet. So you should not give them up for life just to get your freak on. Like that's
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
that's ridiculous. So give them up for the day of if you especially know they cause you problems. But if you're not fucking today, you should eat them and see how you react to them. The next one up is for sure, dairy. Dairy gives a lot of people problems. Again, if you're in other countries, this seems to be a uniquely American problem because our cows are like a problem here big time. So that's why it's really important to know if it really causes you that kind of problem. But dairy has no fiber in it, no matter where you're living. So that's one of the problems. That's one of the reasons it can be a problem is it can cause a lot of havoc in the prep, in the prep arena. when you're in the bathroom trying to get ready. But there's of course like exceptions like full fat yogurts and kefir, which is like that fermented milk drink. There seems to be a lot of studies out there that that's really good on your gut health. So days you're not bottoming, go for it. You should have those because that's good for your overall health.
Danielle Bezalel:
Mm-hmm.
Alex Hall:
But there are definite red flag ones like artificial sweeteners are a big one. They cause gas. Yeah, like Splenda is like a big one. But another one is UPFs, which are ultra processed foods. So I'm gonna keep shouting out Tim Spector because I love to shout out scientists and doctors. Like I'm just the slutty whore.
Danielle Bezalel:
The messenger.
Alex Hall:
I'm the slutty whore
Danielle Bezalel:
The
Alex Hall:
chef
Danielle Bezalel:
slutty
Alex Hall:
that
Danielle Bezalel:
messenger.
Alex Hall:
is bringing you the tea. Like I'm just bringing the tea. I'm
Danielle Bezalel:
Love it.
Alex Hall:
bringing the teapot and I'm pouring it into your little teacup. But... Tim Spector, he gives out a really great example of what ultra-processed foods start. So take a quart of whole milk. That is not very processed. Take a thing of yogurt that is plain yogurt. That's minimally processed. Take yogurt that has fake fruit, sugar, all these colorings, all that. That's ultra-processed. So those are like the three layers. And all the snacks on the shelves, like chips and like. the, you know, just all the junk food, really. Those are all ultra processed foods. So you have to find like a balance though, cause it, you know, again, I'm not gonna tell you to quit those things for life. Like
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
some people are like, fuck you, I want my chips. And it's like, okay, well that's fine, but like balance it out,
Danielle Bezalel:
Right.
Alex Hall:
balance these things out. So ultra processed foods are a really big one to keep an eye out for. Frozen TV dinners are an ultra processed food. Like things like that are just, you're better off. buying a bag of frozen broccoli and cooking the food that would have gone on the sides. Like you, it's better to buy those ingredients all frozen individually and make it at home rather than buying a TV dinner of it made.
Danielle Bezalel:
That's good. That is good advice. I feel like we we even like, you know, Trader Joe's and like I love Trader Joe's but like and I love their frozen stuff. But yeah, for sure. That stuff
is very processed.
Alex Hall:
Trader Joe's is like the king of ultra processed food. So like, I mean, I'm not gonna even go up against that behemoth of a like, like there's no defeating Trader Joe's people. Ilove Trader Joe's too, but like countless, countless. And I mean, like, even when you go like to their peanut butters, there's like one regular peanut butter. And then there's like 20. ultra processed peanut butters that have all these damn flavors and
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
all these things in them. And it's just like, you have to be aware of those because your body will, your gut health will be extremely upset by all of the additives in those foods. And that's what can cause the gas and bloating, diarrhea, it can make your stool not very, like it can cause a lot of problems.
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally, yeah. Yes, wow, I've learned so much from you today, so thank you so much for being here.
Alex Hall:
thank you so much. I can't believe how much I know about this.
Danielle Bezalel:
What do you really hope that people like ultimately walk away with when they are kind of seeing your content and understanding what you're teaching them? And how do you think it's hopefully changed the way that people think about eating and bottoming?
Alex Hall:
Wow, I love this question because I take this into account, honestly, every day when I create something. And I think that, especially like about a year ago when I had hit my one year mark with the bottom side Jess, and I was really like figuring out, okay, how do I wanna keep doing this content? Cause I don't wanna make every video about just bottoming at this point. Where I'm like, I've even asked my audience, like, do y'all want recipes for days that you're not bottoming? And that's been overwhelmingly a yes.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yeah.
Alex Hall:
And like, things that are just overall good for you and healthy. And I think the biggest thing that I want from my audience is just to gain a stronger sense of self and a stronger sense of like, what foods make me feel like that bitch? What foods make me feel awful?
Danielle Bezalel:
Mmm.
Alex Hall:
Am I willing to feel awful every once in a while because I love that food? Like the fact that you're even asking yourself those questions, that's, you know. you're already becoming more in tune with yourself. And like RuPaul says, I know this is corny, but if you can't love yourself, how the hell are you gonna live without us? So like, if you can't ask yourself these questions and communicate with yourself how you're feeling and all that, how the hell are you gonna communicate with a partner in the bedroom that you're not feeling comfortable, you're not enjoying something like. taking that time to communicate with your internal thoughts about how something's making you feel is a vital step. So that's kind of what I want my channel to, to really teach people is like to evaluate recipes and be like, Oh, this thing doesn't work for me. I'm gonna swap that out with something else. That is a huge win right away you're already doing my number one goal, which I do not preach about constantly because then it'll make it preachy is to not starve before bottoming. Like, That is so harmful and it's just made up. I know it's made up in our community and it's honestly because of toxic white made up of patriarchal masculinity. The list goes on. It's all because of th
Danielle Bezalel:
And food is special, right? Like it really brings people together. It can make you feel really good. It can make you feel so much pleasure and joy. And it's just, it's fun. It's great.
Alex Hall:
It's so special. It kills me because people, especially like I'm honing on gay men for this one particular part. They make these dumb ass jokes about starving before bottoming, but then go to brunch and have some of the best memories of going to drag brunches. And I've seen you bitches eating at these drag brunches. They don't fucking don't joke. And that is important. Like. It's fun to like go and do these and eat together and get drunk together and all that. And I know a lot of them are bottoming afterwards. Let's be real.
Danielle Bezalel:
Totally.
Alex Hall:
So these jokes about starving beforehand, they're extremely harmful. And when someone, if I was 16 and I had landed on TikTok with this joke about starving beforehand, I may have thought that that was what I had to do. I may have thought that that was actually a requirement. in order to do so. So that is why I just really want my channel to just destroy that myth.
Danielle Bezalel:
Yes, and yeah, again, I just, I love your content so much. It's so wonderful. I wonder if you could just share, you know, like what are you kind of working on next and where can our followers find you?
Alex Hall:
Yes, so hopefully working on a cookbook next, in talks with a cookbook, a book agency for a minute now, so hopefully a cookbook that's been very demanded from my audience and I love it. My background is graphic designer. That's gonna be super fun So I cannot wait, but you know, just a really campy sex ed cookbook. I'm also revitalizing my YouTube currently. If you're familiar with like strangers, or people of New York, I really want to do something similar, but like it meets Pit Stop from Drag Race, where it's like a drag queen sitting across from another drag queen interviewing them.
Danielle Bezalel:
Oh, amazing.
Alex Hall:
I really wanna meld those worlds together with my YouTube and really start bringing other people, famous and not famous, that are that bottom. And I want them to come on and talk to me about their experiences, their times combating shame, what they've done to laugh off stuff, what they've done to not laugh off stuff. Like, so that it's not just me all the time talking to people. I want, I really want people to start seeing other perspectives. So,
Danielle Bezalel:
you should call it get to the bottom of it.
Alex Hall:
yes, oh my God. So I know, like, thank you for that because we had a great name and then we found out it was taken. And then, so like, I just really wanna be so much more collaborative in the next ongoing future. Like, it's been super fun for the last two years, but it's called the Bottom Side Jest, not Alex's Digest. So I'm really just trying to get back to being the host of the Bottom Side Jest, where I talk to a lot of other people. And maybe even a podcast down the road, who knows?
Danielle Bezalel:
Oh, that would be amazing.
Alex Hall:
that's been highly requested too, so. I think that that'll be a really great space to also, again, talk to a lot of people about what they've done. I think it'd be fun to do a podcast where we talk about the times we've quite literally had to check people that we're topping. So on that note, you can catch me on TikTok at bottomsidejess. You can catch me on Instagram at bottomsidejess. Same with my YouTube. My website is thebottomsidest.com. That's where all my recipes live. I'm about to put resources up on my website a lot more. And yeah, I'm also on Twitter, but God knows where the fuck Twitter is going to be in the next year. So you can follow me there.
Danielle Bezalel:
Alex, thank you so much for being on. This has been so wonderful chatting with you. I really appreciate it.
Alex Hall:
Yay, thank you so much, Danielle. You're the best. I appreciate it.